Dear Beth: Thanks for the peas♥. (Sorry about the Ads!)

     My Dear Beth: {sp? Venison, the Natural Protein.org}

     I want to thank you… {Hallmark Cards.com}
for the, (ok, let’s call em the ‘small round objects’)… (Nice try, Sherlock. all_Seeds.com./ geometry_online 4 Idiots.co.ru}
…which you sent me. {Fed-Ex: the Logistical Solution}
I looked carefully this morning… {Optica:_4_ur_I’s}
…and it appears that 99% of them… {occupy_Wall_Street.org Join the fight!}
…have already raised their little heads above the surface. {micro_cephliacs_anonymous.org}
This was such a sweet thing you did for me. {‘Saccharine, the modern sweetener!’}
Truly, God seems to be blessing our little endeavor here in the Holy Land. {Oy! Get Right with God.com/ Israel in Biblical Prophesy: the Truth!/ See following page for much more…}
Perhaps I should not have  had any doubts… {U2- ‘Losing my Religion’ click here for free download}
…but lately, everything I do seems to backfire. {Chilton Auto manuals: click on your make ‘n model for price!}
At any rate… {digital Sensors.com velocity/throughput, we have it!}
…I couldn’t have done it without your help. {‘Seven Steps to a More confident You}
And so when I get a chance… {Round_to_it.com: Jokes direct to your Inbox}
…I will send you a photo… {No file attached! Send anyway? Ok?/ Cancel?}
…of the progress… {‘Pilgrim’s Progress’ @ Amazon.com/ ‘Progress #9’, when you seriously need a Pea!}
…of my green garden. {Sustainability.org}
Just don’t pay attention… {‘A-D-D’.org We are here for you. Remember?}
…to all the weeds. {NORML.org
Yours truly, {Find Ur Tru_luv @ Carbon14_date.com
Yonatan Solberg {RootsWeb.comSearch your ancestors. Free!}

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32 thoughts on “Dear Beth: Thanks for the peas♥. (Sorry about the Ads!)

  1. jsolberg

    @gnostic1 – Oy, we got that ‘ask me how’ phrase here, in hebrew on real-estate signs, hair-color salons, and weight-loss free-lance advisors. Perhaps one ‘how’ fits all. Great to see you first, my brother. You are usually preoccupied while the fireworks happen on my posts, tied up in sutures and scalpels. But you always enter with a bang. Don’t know how.

    Reply
  2. Roadkill_Spatula

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  3. Kellsbella

    Awesome thank-you. But I think Beth would really like you to cook for her. No pressure, here. We can all send you some great pea recipes and you can just freeze dry em or somethin and send em (astronaut food?)…..just thinkin out loud here…..Look; all’s I’m sayin is the girl is hungry!

    Reply
  4. jsolberg

    @murisopsis – That jump is easy. M/F flower parts. ‘A pistil in your pocket or are you just happy to be blooming?’ Lineaus started it, the pervert. He never saw a plant which didn’t remind him of some Latin word for genitalia.

    Reply
  5. jsolberg

    @twoberry – NORML, that’s that group who want to take the mystique out of smoking dope, commonly called ‘weed’. Once legalized, you’ll have your Grandma asking you if you want some to take home, along with leftover duck parts. Oy. Leave it cloak and dagger, I say.And I’m thrilled you got the jokes. I gushed to my son that I’d just written this really clever spoof, I was so excited. He coulda done it even hipper, but he’s busy keeping us alive. Barely 21 and sharp as an adze.

    Reply
  6. jsolberg

    @elgan – Fun to hear you found it funny. I ‘like’ Carbon_14_dating and ‘Round_to_it’ if I must say so myself. El, I wrote an email a few days ago to my prop-manager in Pa, detailing a few problems caused by the distance, but in humorous hints and winks. Hit ‘Send’ only to see Google’s new ad for ‘We solve the trials of Ex-pat life!’ Even for a trained robot, that’s an amazing stretch, in parsing my abstruse style. Damn, the World feels new and brave these days.

    Reply
  7. jsolberg

    @MelFamy – Many thanks, and yes, I do still remember the old days beside that fire on the hill-top. We always had that jar, you know, with the copper-rich soil. Turned the flames blue-ish green, and indicated “quotes”. I usually emptied the thing in the first few hours. ‘A bunch of “brave” “white” “men” approaching from the East!’ ‘Let’s “kick some butt” as the saying goes.’ Course on drums, later, we had the colon, comma, and parentheses, but I always missed the incendiary style.

    Reply
  8. jsolberg

    @locomotiv – Wish I could send you a couple pounds, fresh. The big question here is when to plant, since our seasons have no correlation to to US climates. I’m going by temperature, cheating-early on length of daylight, and ignoring that the rainy season is about over. I’ll give them your regards./ js

    Reply

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