Expose: “Underwriters overlook underhanded overcharging scheme”

   Safety-first agency ‘Underwriter’s Laboratories’ attempted to crawl out from under the bus this week over a damning report in the gadfly biz-blog  ‘Y-Axis.com’ which detailed some ‘frayed cords’ in their top management.
The web-rag’s sleuths slothed through a slew of soggy documents in the company’s dumpster and assembled a picture of systematic over-pricing given a wink by underlings in the Front Office.
In one example, upstart down-market appliance firm Tanyo, whose 914XL Over’N Under Oven/Stove Combo threatened to undercut the competition was met with an impossible demand: “Reverse the stacking order, re-label it as ‘Under ‘n Over’ and re-apply to Underwriters.’, (along with a fee for supposed ‘services’ of $19,000 cold cash. Tanyo blinked, and the American consumer lost eye-contact with what would have been an economical product offering.
Underwriters, through their law firm, Hanover, Andover, and Underhill refused to speak with this reporter as of post date.
Still, the list of over-charged firms lengthens by the hour. Geriadiator, maker of over-the counter heat-pads for the over-the-hill under-the weather crowd, joined the class-action suit filed by Y-Axis Friday, as did Breath-alyzer Inc, whose latest device seemingly caught the eye of the vertically-obsessed Underwriters. A scrawled “Make up your minds; it’s ‘under the influence’ or ‘over the legal limit’, choose one(1)” was all they got after two months of waiting for a coveted ‘Seal of Approval’ on the newest 229XG. Company executives struggled to make sense of it; both the attached $40K bill and the challenge of issuing a statement any more diplomatic than ‘WTF?!’
This writer simply hopes that all the dog work, under the cover of darkness, by Y-Axis’ researchers will bear fruit, and that when it is all over, Underwriters will be under investigation by some government oversight commission.

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25 thoughts on “Expose: “Underwriters overlook underhanded overcharging scheme”

  1. chromepoet

    … over the hill and under the weather to medical hash we turn …So, let me get this down straight, lest I screw it up. You are trying to understand overuse by undermining the underwriters over-the-counter AC/DC plug/connectors?

    Reply
  2. we_deny_everything

    stand/I take/you to/throw takings/myGive up? I understand you undertake to overthrow my undertakings. My dad taught me this when I was just a little tyke. After this, he lapsed into a frown that lasted for decades.

    Reply
  3. twoberry

    This time I’m trying to comment by clicking the “comment box not working” thingie:If this comment is unable to be posted, the over-under on when I will be able to post is 10 hours. I’m forced to underestimate my actual predicted break-even point by two hours due to the hour that I need to get off the computer and go to work.I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed by all of this.

    Reply
  4. MelFamy

    UL settled out of court in Duhiki vs. Weems. But the damage to their reputation cannot be undone with a confidentiality agreement, as it is already widely known how they conspired with the company to hide the fact that certain models of Duhiki’s side-crisper model refrigerators had defective interior lighting that stayed on when the door was closed.

    Reply
  5. jsolberg

    @ordinarybutloud – ha. That reminds me of my ‘Duh, whassdat?’ two(2) day non-comprehende of the unfamiliar term ‘SUV’, after a rare exit of my insular world and entering the Untied Snakes. It sounds unbelievable, but they were all over CNN in Frankfort and Atlanta, Larry King, USA Today, but *nobody* felt any need to define the term.. until I was out of earshot. Gave new meaning to ‘out of the loop’.

    Reply
  6. jsolberg

    @murisopsis – Agreed. And Val, this whole post is your doing you know. You and Max’s. Jess contends he over-reacted. I overheard her bitching while pushing her Mom’s cart suspiciously near an undertaker’s shop. Mom claims ‘it ain’t over till the stage buckles under the Fat lady.’ Great story you wrote there, kid.

    Reply
  7. twoberry

    Just checking to see if I can comment without clicking the “comment box not working?” thingie. Gotta get out from under this predicament, then get over it, finally. Then I will no longer be under your spell. Check?Note: The click was required. 😦

    Reply
  8. jsolberg

    @twoberry – I feel as helpless as a small SOMA-eater in Brave New World, was it? Doesn’t seem to be a universal glitch, but then what do I know? War is Peace, truth is Falsity? Here, have some more of the purple berries.

    Reply
  9. twoberry

    @gnostic1 – I wonder if gnostic1’s problem is similar to mine. I hit reply to you both, but my replydisappeared, too, but before I tried to submit, I put it on my clipboard. Then clicked the “comment box not working thingie?,” pasted, resubmitted, and lo and behold you see what you see.)Not exactly. The “comment box not working thingie?” — used in conjunction with the reply function, resulted in that html language, and THAT’s what makes you see what you see.You see?

    Reply
  10. jsolberg

    @twoberry – Hmm… I take it very seriously when anyone, M/F reports that something of mine isn’t working. All I can say is that I’m not taking any medications recently which I’ve not shared with the doctor and/or the public. But there may be a Pulitzer/ Golden Fleece in it if we can nail this bug to the wall. Thanks for your continuing diligence.

    Reply

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