Top Blogs? No Prob… Here’s the Secret!

     It was write in front of my nose the hole time: Just Emulate the Winners(!)

So I’m talking to my currant squeeze, call her ‘M’, an’ she’s like: ‘Um, Ken we talk about the future…” an’ I go: “Who the f*ck’s Ken?” and she’s all “No, its ‘K’-‘A’-‘N’, you dum sh*t!” and than I new what she ment.
An’ I go: “The future, Huh?” and she sez “Yeah, the Future, capitol ‘F’  Sooo… IDK, I like flipped out ‘n shit:
“M, you late?” I aksed her, but I didn’t lissen, y’know, to what she said than, cuz it hit me:
Emulate! That’s the secret formula. Ima gonna be on the Front Page fer shure now. Theirs some dog-work to it, but I can handle it. Esp now since ‘M’ left, I guess. Who cares; a guy like me’ll get another 1 in ten minits.

So anywho, here’s what I got so far: I looked at all the T-100 blogs an’ ok, a couple, like that seed gurl ‘n Mel somebody, ya gotta, like, know some special shit for, looks like, but just to get up there witch is the hole dreem, its enuf to rite:
“Hi everyone! I’m just getting started on Xanga… Drop me a comment if you’ve got some ideas on what to do first – or just to say, “Hi!”
Every day there’s at least one of those.

But I gess it helps to get ur freinds to praze you. I might go with this one I seen:
“13 recs and 12 comments ? yesss (: thanks guys. ! this time i’m gonna try for 20 recs and 18
comments for anot… ”
That 1’s waayyy up their near the Top! Not sure what ‘anot’ is, but sh’ell prolly get 18 comments for one of ’em. Damn, Xanga gettin’ EZ-er ‘n EZ-R ROFLMAO.

Still, its tuff for me to like, totaly give up on stuff with meet. Here’s one I oughta try’n copy: (sorry, ’emulate’) It wuz number 40 or so. Gud enuf 4 me:

“day four. paragraphs of words or, a few short sentences. their all so meaningless. just a long description of…”

I’ll prolly change it to ‘just a ‘short’ description of…’, though. PPL read it ‘n, you know, their busy so I’ll just let ’em Comment, Rec,& Sub real fast and get back to the Mall or wherevah.

Now If I wuz thinner I could go the rout of “binge, purge, puke, weigh myself+ my vomit, poop, then rite about it”. That’s what about a quarter of the Featured winners do every day. I think there in-thinuated by the thiren thong of skeleton-ness.But no dice, I weighed 81.73 kilos, at 9:30 this morning. Like to get down to 81.50 by midnight, tho. Good thing ‘M’ split, that pig-out nom-nom-nik. Still, a quarter of the winners R thin-skis? That’s like, 30%! Mebbe I’ll eat like crazy for a week, then I ken puke off the lbs and be famous two, LOL. Meh.
  Wait, did I say ‘ken’? Guess I miss her. Damm ‘M’. FML! I’ll just write about how messed up I am. Like this entry. (I’ll give mine #’s too, to keep trak):

“001. OK so your a what if everyone thinks your a little quiet. maybe all my friends
would turn agai…”
Course Ima hopping my friends dont ‘turn agai‘. Fame ain’t worth that. Hold on a sec.Phone’s ringing -BRB-

“Heyya ‘M’, Whassup?
“You’re not?”
“Hey cool. Yeah, you ken come over, we’ll hang out or sumpthin'”

Ok guys, sorry 4 the waist of time. F*ck famus. Ferget you read this. You prolly alredy did.


9 thoughts on “Top Blogs? No Prob… Here’s the Secret!

  1. ordinarybutloud

    I think “squeeze” is, like, totally 70s. Like, the NINETEEN 70s. How old are you?!? (not a real question). The way you get on Top Blogs is title your post, “BOOBS and more BOOBS!!!! (don’t look)”

  2. elgan

    Oh you poor, poor man. It must have been so painful for you to write this one. My condolences. I almost needed a translator, at times. Well done!

  3. gnostic1

    Mostly excellent work, butt cracks about thiren thongs are plumbing the line under wear we draw the line. I’ll try again but I don’t seem to be successful when eye rec.


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