I had a rash all over my butt when it happened. Two weeks. Only went away slowly when I took off that god-damn lead apron I made in a hurry. Probably didn’t wash the Sulfuric acid off the battery plates good enough. The diarrhea stayed with me though, for a month at least. I wrote it down each day, you know, the details, color, amount, etc. Wonder if I can find that book…
I still say it was from the river. I was swimming there, in the Susquehanna about a dozen miles downstream when I heard about the accident on somebody’s car radio parked up on the bank. He left in a hurry.
A lot of people evacuated. I thought about it too, but hell, being stuck in a traffic jam, dribbling all over the car seat, probably throwing up out the window as the radiation got worse. Not that I didn’t puke enough staying at home. Mostly on the lawn, even though I tried to stay indoors, especially after the reports of a hydrogen gas buildup in the containment building. Looked like pizza after a turn or two in a blender. I’d post the pictures except that this was before digital cameras and scanners. Oh yeah, and the internet. In those days if you needed to know more about prolapsed hemorrhoids you had to call somebody, which was embarrassing. Or do what I did; signed up for a mail-order course from, in my case, Texas Medical Institute. Course I missed the whole section on the anus and the rectum while the meltdown was happening. So I had to kinda ‘solve’ the painful, itching symptoms at least, using another homemade device. Which I won’t go into. TMI, you know.
Wu: Eeew. Gross!
Js: Yeah, a pretty shitty way to heat water, I say.
Wu: No, I mean the asshole part.
Js: Yeah, I’m not sure that Texas Institute is even accredited.
Wu: You don’t get it bud, do you?
Js: Get what? There’s a lot of important historical information here…
Wu: One could even call it ‘too much’.